I received a call today from the local Police Benevolence Association.  They carry out a program annually where they take children in need shopping to clothing and supplies – it’s a great program.

But when I received the call, this is how it went:

“Hello.”

“Umm, is this the proprietor of the business?  Umm, is this Ben?”

“Ummm, yes.”

“How are you today?”

“I’m doing well, thanks.  How are you?”

“Well, I, umm, woke up a little late today, but other than that I’m doing okay.  Anyway, I’m from the Normal Police Benevolent Association and ….. (entered into a description of what they do and the program – which I was already familiar with by the way)…”

“Yes, I’m familiar with that.”

“Well we’re hoping to take 20 more kids than we took last year.  Can we count on your this year for your support?”

“Well, actually not right now.  Thanks.”

“Can I ask why?”

“I’m already involved with a number of local charities and right now can’t extend myself any more.”

“You don’t think you could even just give $10?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, and if you continue to ask I can guarantee you it will make me much less likely to consider giving in the future.”

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Okay … a few thoughts and observations…

1. How about calling and asking “May I speak with Ben, please?”.  Don’t ask if I am the proprietor of the business.  Can you get less personal?

2. When I ask how you’re doing, I don’t actually care if you won’t up late.  In fact, don’t say anything of the sort.  A simple “I’m great, thanks for asking!” will make me much more encouraged and inspired to listen to you.

3. Don’t go into your speech about the project … ask if I am familiar with it first.  Otherwise you insult my intelligence – and refer to point number 1 – can you get less personal?

4.  When I tell you “no” once … that should typically be enough.  If you want to ask why, I’m more than happy to tell you.  But respect me enough to not continue to push after I’ve told you why.  Simply say “Well we appreciate all you do in the community and hope that next year you’ll consider us.  Thanks for taking the time to speak with me.  Have a wonderful day!”

Then next year when you call, I might consider it.  But after that phone call today, you might as well remove me from your list.